wikiHow

My new favorite website. No, I'm serious. Not only does this site take me back to my high school days, it makes me want to email it to every parent with teenagers and internet access. It's all here:

How to Convince Your Boyfriend to Tell People Your Dating Him, with brilliant observations and suggestions:

• ask him after a kiss because he is more likley to agree
• .but if he gets angry he is no good
• .rememer boys brains are smaller than ours

How to Tell Your Best Friend Her Boyfriend Is Breaking up With Her to Go out With You (Tips include: Think about how to make new friends.)

How to Keep Your Parents From Knowing You Have a Boyfriend or Girlfriend, which includes sage advice such as:

• Change your secret love's name in your cellphone. In a case where you leave your cell in the kitchen and your parents snoop, they won't know that "Tom" has called you ten times today. Change it to "Brittany" or "Sarah", and unless your parents take the phone from your ear to see if it is who you say it is, this plan is foolproof.
• Introduce him to your parents as your friend's boyfriend (then they won't suspect anything, unless you are a lousy friend).
• Introduce him as your Gay friend (this can explain away hugging incidents).

For those of us not still under our parents' control and custody, there is still a world of helpful "How To" instructions available. That hot guy you met last week coming out of the head shop? Check out How to Date a 'Stoner'. It lists "drinks & snacks" under "Things You'll Need". How would you have ever figured that out on your own?! For those who have an unnatural obsession with their friends' appearances, perhaps How to Tell a Friend to Remove Upper Lip Hair can help. For the criminal in all of us, there are even instructions on How to Con Someone.

Now, most of these are silly and dumb and good for nothing more than a good laugh. There are helpful "How To" pages, as well - they're just not as much fun to write about. I must admit being slightly disappointed that there are no instructions for wiping your ass. I'm thinking of requesting that one. That's right - if there's a topic you're curious about that no one has written on yet, you can request that someone supply you with step-by-step instructions. Each category has a request section - ranging from semi-ridiculous topics like (How To) Be Like Raven Baxter from "That's So Raven" to serious inquiries such as How to Deal With a Bipolar Family Member.

Next time I need to know how to do something, I hope I remember to click this site first. Even if I don't find the info I'm looking for, I'm almost guaranteed to find a good laugh.